As the Worm Turns

So I weighed in, and lost 1.4 pounds. Which is good. That puts me at a 42.2 pounds total lost/removed (26.8 left to go to get to my goal).
But I needed to finish figuring out how the heck I ended up making out with my kid's school lunch JIF because a week where I am truly on track with eating, drinking water and working out is more likely to see me losing 2-3 pounds. That's one of the benefits of this amazing program- the amount you can lose.

To the rescue came my Dietitian, to add the missing peice to my puzzle. Between Woodstock and Counselor Cassie I had figured out that my weekend was hijacked and I responded by gorging on something I convinced myself was "okay". But that couldn't be all...

So Kathryn (who is, by the way, a total Dynamo - though that isn't a very cute nickname) says to me that "it's like a worm in a maze".

A worm? In a maze?

As she explained, it made more sense (I was initially struggling with why it wasn't a rat, and also who puts a worm into a maze? Is that even fair? Do they have a brain, or just a nerve bundle?)

The worm is our habits, our tendencies. They go the direction that works for them when we have stress (The maze. The maze is stress).

Wormie likes to go the easiest way. In my case, prior to 20/20 I would have gone after a box of red vines and some salt n vinegar chips. But my worm can't go there, because I don't eat those now. So he tries to go another direction- nuts. I am nuts for nuts, there are no two ways about it. And since a limited amount of nuts are allowed on 20/20, my worm is wriggling that way in the maze.

My worm needs somewhere else to go, she said. And, as usual, she wasn't going to give me the answer. Getting healthy is a lot of work.

She wanted me to come up with some alternatives for my worm. What could he do that wouldn't result in guilt, weight gain and possibly a diaper.

I came up with a couple things I do that work well:

1. berries and a magazine. I know berries are food, but they are low cal and feel like a treat. And I don't subscribe to any magazines, so getting them is a treat.
2. The barn- I have a horse, and going to the barn is a slice of heaven for me. No food required.

and I am working on adding more to my list. I think this is so important, finding things to help you deal with stress that don't involve pigging out.

I'll share more as I think of them, but I don't want to list things that I wish would make me feel better. Like, I wish that going running made me feel awesome. It does, but not until afterwards and not enough (yet) for me to hop off the Sofa of Depression to go run.

I am signing off now, leaving you with a terrible graphic that I made of a worm in a maze.